Friday, May 9, 2008

You'll two are too much men

My friend who moved to Bombay from Calcutta is going back. A job he loves, great apartment by the sea in bandra, loves the annonimity this city offers but he still has to go back. Why? Because he is sick of being called a proudy and snobby. 3 months in the city and he just cannot handle it.
It took him a couple of years getting used to the fact that people laughed at him when he typed complete words in a sms. He could live with that and continued dotting the Is.
Agreed accents in Bengali can be eh..confusing, to put it mildly. He also had friends from bihar who had to somehow get the call bell, good self and cardva into every alternate sentence. Hence he was prepared for the mumbaiya hindi. When the maid came in, one day, sobs asking for leave since she had to go to the muluk kyunki mausi off ho gayi, he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. He learnt new meanings to words and new words like kotmir and phatka.
What he could not take is grown ups, professionals, people with degrees from prestigious institutes, constantly having conversations in a language that did not sound like the English he knew.
He took pains explaining his pal that he was not seeing or doing the girl he had coffee with two evenings ago. Or to the receptionist in office that he was not looking for an item right away.
In meetings no one flinched when the marketing dude went :shits yaar I thought the sponsorer was phasaoed. Or when the girl at the next workstation announced that she was kaltoing since her cousin brother had sawed a film and wanted her to saw it as well. He thought he’d tell her about how she could join the carpenter who needed an assistant.
So now he will go to a land where nobody will tell him not to back answer or ask him who his family god was
When he was putting in his papers his colleague called him fully chakram and the receptionist looked pained and went – getting less dough no? He said a firm no.
only to meet the guard who waved goodbye clutching on to his mobile and saying sm karte rehna boss


Ras said...

lol! u mixed yr friend's sombre state of mind with such wonderful language that i didnt know whether to laugh or cry!

riya said...

And so he's going back to a city where people say "I am very much angry with yourself....?" and "I am too much afraid?????" Not to mention "Nobody is maintaining decorum in this hooligan place". Now, that really makes sense.

Guru said...

Only a true Bong can find sanity in Kolkata... bhery good!!!